The fear of letting down our guard – a tarot perspective. 

Minor Arcana - Major Thoughts, The Pondering Chair

A recent reading got me thinking a little about how our experiences shape our perception to the point of caging ourselves up so safely that we limit our ability to move freely and enjoy being able to feel and care without fear.

We guard our hearts and spirits so carefully we forget how to bend and shift with the flow. Somehow our rigid stance becomes the only way we know how to be, and we pine for the days when trust, faith and hope came as naturally as breathing. 

It’s a funny thing the power our mind has over us. It’s sad that scars run so deep that they impact so much on every new relationship or choice we are offered. Part of this is self preservation. Part of this is fear. To be free of the bonds would be the most beautiful thing in the world sometimes. 

The challenge of the 9 of Swords is to understand that not all the threats we see are real. Nightmares wake us and that is the thing – we wake up. Waking up in a metaphorical sense is good. It helps us grow and gain awareness. 
Differentiating between the imagination and reality can be tricky when we have worked hard to find safety and healing. We fear risking that again. How can we live a life that is full and joyous if we remain a prisoner of our fears, or in our self made little cocoon. We cannot. 

The only way forward is in small measures. A little way, pause and check, then a little way more. If this gets us moving in the direction of freedom, light and love – the very thing we were born to have – then so be it. 

Little by little, ever so patiently moving out into the world. Each step a success in it’s own right. Yes, the scars will always be there. But that heart still beats. Maybe one day without even realising it, the safety guard might be lowered enough to allow that spirit to be fully part of something breathtaking, with enough trust to feel safe. No longer constantly assessing for danger and threats. 
Then you will have become the master of your own heart, rather than the gatekeeper. I look forward to that day. Very much! 

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